9.26.11 End of Day Randoms

• Pepperoni pizza almost killed me today.
• I haven't had beef since 2005 & pork since 2008.
• It was my fault because I shouldn't of ate it, but that pain I experienced is what I hope giving birth DOES NOT feel like.
• My ex boyfriend I haven't seen in over 6yrs popped up to see me at home. He's such a different person, change looks good on him.
• Accomplished step 1 of getting rid of that jealousy bug & congratulated him on the new baby. He said it was weird to hear me say that.
• We had a decent conversation before he had to leave. It was so good seeing him today.
• What is with these places that are hiring telling people to not to call to check the status of applications?
• Found a sewing machine on Craigslist for $40! I'll be calling that lady this weekend!
• I learned how to do a fishtail braid today. I don't think anyone understands how excited I am about knowing how to do this.
• I've been wanting to do this type of braid for about 6yrs & even in hair school the teacher couldn't show us how to do it.
• Click any of those last 2 links to see my hair post on the fishtail braid if you're interested on learning it!
• I found a picture dated for 10/2/2010 of my best friend & myself & I had the same type braids in that I have in now.
• I don't think that date is right because I wasn't chilling with her like that last October, I'm thinking it was 2/10/10.
• I'm about to start calling all guys hunks & honey..... Then again, maybe not. They may think I'm down to fuck when I'm really not.
• Eczema spots on my leg & neck is murdering me. The urge to itch is horrible.
• My tummy still feels weird from the attempted pepperoni homicide earlier.
• Listened to Phonte's Charity Starts At Home mixtape & dope doesn't even describe it well enough. Love it from top to bottom, no skips.
• I can't wait for the day I can create something that I can wear proudly & have someone compliment me on it. Is that vain?

9.25.11 Randoms

• I've been sleeping a whole lot recently.. Idk if it's the weather change or what, but sleep is #1 these days.
• I wish my mother would stop wanting to talk about my paternal grandmother's failing health. I just don't want to come to the fact that she is dying.
• I need a get away from life for like a hour or so... Drugs can do that right?
• My mother got mad at me for telling her to stop bringing up my Grandma (which seemed like) every 5 minutes this weekend.
• Prayer works, right?
• I'm super bored.. If gas wasn't so high, I would love to just drive around for a little bit.
• Doing hair Friday afternoon/evening. Possibly Saturday too.
• Thanksgiving plans have changed: was going to stay home & cook, but we'll be in NYC for Thanksgiving. I ain't mad at all.
• Still looking for a quick, mind freeing get away.
• Got a couple phone calls to make tomorrow morning, checking the status of some applications. Always fun -__-

Just stupid...

Why is it that it's more acceptable seeing a underage girl pregnant? I get weird looks like something is wrong with me since I'm over 21 & don't have any kids. Not saying I'm better than anyone, but having kids when you can't afford to care for them is just stupid & I won't put myself or a baby in this situation. I hear and see too many times about mothers who can barely support their families and I don't want that to be me.

(Re: this minor rant (is this a rant?) has been brought to you by church this morning where a 13yr old girl is currently pregnant & thoughts/past experiences where I was questioned about my age & current parental status)

9.22.11 Randoms

• I did a good deed today! I'm even proud of myself.
• Cooked dinner for my grandma.... Then turned around and cooked dinner at home.
• I'm seriously pooped.
• Something about my ex-bf commenting on my FB is confusing.......
• I want to add more people to my 2nd Facebook, but I'm thinking about deleting both profiles altogether.
• I made buttery potatoes & they are DELISH. I may share that recipe if I'm asked.
• Just randomly started reciting Wale lyrics.. I can't remember the song title or who else is featured......
• I also made some of the stickiest, sweetest, crunchiest bbq chicken wings in my entire cooking history.
• So happy that my weight loss is visible.... Now to work on that working out thing -__-
• I figured out what Wale song it was... Rather Be With You <--- click that & listen!
• I want to have one last cookout of the year before it gets too cold. Maybe invite some folks over to enjoy my cooking.
• My mother won't even care as long as I cook enough for the week.
• Facebook & these questions/numbers games bore me... Yet I want to join in: bittersweet.
• Listened to Kanye most of the day.. That guy is amazing.
• Rethinking the whole deleting of my Facebook idea............
• I'm sleepy.... Good night!

9.21.11 Random Thoughts

• Finally updated my hair blog.. <---click that! It has pics!
• That spot where I had my shingles rash feels funny. The doctor said that would happen, ugh.
• I've applied to a couple holiday jobs, hopefully something pans out so I can have some regular money for a couple months.
• I cleaned & rearranged my room last Friday. It's back to being messy all over again. Smh.
• I love that I can get up & have to do NOTHING to my hair. Let's see how long that lasts.
• I feel like I'm becoming more of a prude. That's a change I'm not sure I'm okay with.
• I'm not saying I was/am Miss Lucy Goosey, but I'm very open about sex.
• I feel like I have a stomach virus. This just needs to stop.
• Just noticed that ever sentence before this one, except 2, start with I. I guess that's okay since I am talking about myself.
• Ebony decided she would talk in 3rd person from this point forward.
• Ebony gave someone the title of boyfriend, when that person isn't even her boyfriend. Why would she do such a thing?
• She also said that she needs to change her toenail polish. Ebony stays doing her nails.
• Is Ebony annoying you by speaking in 3rd person?
• Okay, I'm done with that.
• Doing my little cousin's hair tomorrow... Yay?

9.18.11 Randoms

• I have been braiding my hair since Friday and I'm still not done.
• I love going to lunch with older people. They always pay & you learn something.
• Went to church today after missing about 8 Sundays in a row.
• We got some cuteness @ church, specifically in the Music Department. Just *licking fingers*
• I had a dream that my cut buddy got shot & died, but what stands out the most is his aunt telling me that I love him and that I needed to tell him.
• Some guy at church, came up to me & said "I like these braids *grabs hair* They are very poetic... justice.." I didn't even get mad, just laughed!
• I cooked that French fried onion fried chicken for dinner today & it isn't half bad!
• You know how most people say rejection just makes them go harder for what they want? Yeah, not for me.
• Trey Songz was a better singer when he had braids. Now he's just something to look at (which is a good thing), but his singing is just bleh.
• I already know what I'm getting for Christmas.

My "Teeth issue"

Let me give you the background story: I was between 5 or 8, my mother, my cousins, my aunt, & myself were out to eat at some restaurant after hitting the mall. Our waiter had as I yelled "rabbit teeth". I pointed dead in this man's face and screamed loud enough for everyone to hear "HE HAS RABBIT TEETH! LOOK MOM, RABBIT!". I don't remember when or what happened after that except I got a beating for doing that.

Ever since that day (I'm guessing), I had a issue with people and their teeth. I get highly disgusted when I see someone with a mouth full of NO. Especially a cute guy. All throughout school, I only liked guys with nice teeth. I think it was about Junior year in HS that I realized my issue with teeth. Now as an adult, a nice pair of chompers are #1 on my list of likes. My thing for teeth is so bad that one of my best friends wanted to set me up on a double date with her boyfriend's best friend that she damn near had to beg me to go out with the man because he had yuckmouth. I did go on the date because he was good company, but that was our first & last date. His teeth were just too much NO. And by NO I mean yellow, plaque crusted, stank breath, and jumbled. You can have a set of teeth that are mismatched, but at least make sure I can't see the cheese on them & you keep them white. I can appreciate that.

Anyway, after all these years of having this issue my mother apologized for helping me have this issue. She said that she should of explained to me why it was wrong instead of beating me. Then said, "Ebony, you can date anyone no matter how their teeth look." I was like you're crazy! I've been living with this for about 20yrs now and you're a little too late. I am glad that she actually realized she's the reason behind this issue though.

9.14.11 End of day Randoms

• Went to the doctor's today and got a decent report... Lost a couple pounds and my shingles are just about gone. I'm excited.
• While in the doctor's office I picked up a March or May 2011 InStyle Magazine, skimming the pages I see Kim K. & Kris Humphries and I read the caption. She's 5'2" & he's 6'9". How do these super short women get these super tall dudes? A tall woman like myself (5'11.5") needs something 6'9" and up to feel small. But 6ft is good enough for me, even 5'11".
• 16 yrs ago my mother came home with this little lightskinned, grey eyed creature named Malik. I watched him grow to become the almost man that he is today. Happy Birthday lil big brother.
• People really take Twitter serious.
• I had a chicken philly today and oh my lawd, I missed that so much.
• I had to add the .5 to my height... That's my true height.
• I miss wearing heels every other day.
• Cushioned platform pumps are everything and I need 2 pairs (black & nude).
• Watched some of Dr. Oz's "Arsenic in Apple Juice" episode today and OH MY G! I will never ever ever drink apple juice again.
• Yum. Yum. Yum. Common is on Jon Stewart's show right now. That's one fine man.
• I listened to most of Watch The Throne and I feel bamboozled. Otis isn't even up there, what type of bull is that?
• I also downloaded my guilty pleasure song........ Well a new one.

9.12.11 Randoms

• Listening to Pandora, Ryan Leslie station and Nas' "Still Dreaming" comes on... I love that song.
• I'm so tired of being sick.. UGH!
• Finally painted my toes after about 3 days of naked nails.
• I hate naked toe nails..
• Still confined to the house since I am technically still contagious.
• My medication for the shingles cost so damn much.
• If $100,000 dropped into my back pocket I would have 0 complaints & no debt.
• My debt isn't even a 3rd of that.. So the rest would go to my "wants".
• Could I possibly go to Federal Prison for owing the IRS $2,500?
• Since I did my toes, my hair doesn't have a chance of getting flat ironed at all..
• Working on a surprise b'day present for my little brother......
• This weekend, I'm braiding my hair up.. I can't deal with it & these fevers at the same time.
• Talked to one of my exes this past week and he has matured so much. Good to know time does change some people.
• He kept telling me about his fiancée and the jealous monkey on my back didn't allow me to congratulate him.
• Still working on that jealously thing, btw.
• I read on Tumblr (I think) that black women will be single and unmarried if they keep waiting on black men & that they need to try outside their race. I have no problem with dating another race, but men (in general) don't approach me. Well the right type of guy doesn't approach me: either he's old enough to be my father, too short for my liking, or just interested in sex.
• And I do see some sexy white guys I would love to swirl with..
• Spoke to another ex Saturday night and he was pissed that I haven't called him even though I was sick.. I love when people are mad with me..
• I'm not even the type to complain about being sick, so if I'm not calling you or if you call to come see me and I'm sick.. Best believe something is really wrong.
• Seriously, $100,000 and I'm set.

Randoms for the first day of school....

• I'm not in school but my lil big brother is, starting Junior year in HS. Time has definitely flew.
• So, I spent about 4 hrs in the emergency room yesterday to figure out why I have still been feeling sick & getting fevers: SHINGLES.
• What's crazy about all this is that I've had the chicken pox 2 times as a kid and with me getting the tonsillitis, that virus woke up the chicken pox in my system.
• Shingles fact: 1 in 5 people who have had chicken pox will get shingles. How the hell did I get chose?
• This little girl from church whose hair I do, called my mother a total of 8 times in the past 4 days to try to get her hair done for school.... YESTERDAY. How rude is that? You wait until the holiday/last day because you were out of town. Whose to say I would have been in town?
• Then her mother called my house to speak to my mother like I'm lying about being sick.
• I swear I hate people. If I'm telling you I'm sick, guess what? I'M FUCKING SICK. Leave it at that.
• The tonsillitis cleared up by the way. AWESOME.
• That IV I had in hurt. (Yeah I'm a punk)
• Watching AMTV (videos on MTV in the morning), this is so different from the MTV I watched when I was 10.
• Hearing Anthony Kedis' voice is refreshing.... Red Hot Chili Peppers.
• I'm going back to sleep since it's still early.

You said do what?

So this weekend was actually decent outside of getting/being sick the last 24-32 hours. Friday night my mother & I went to go see my grandma in the hospital (she had a full mastectomy & it went well) and while we were there I got to see my uncles & aunts. One of my uncles, I'll call him Uncle Black Sheep Free Thinker was trying to enlighten me on the ways of the World. This is our exact dialogue:

Uncle BSFT: So you don't work? Or have health insurance? Why don't you get on WIC?

Me & other family members: She/I can't get on welfare unless I have a kid.

Uncle BSFT: So why don't you have one? You're what, 25?

Me: Yeah. Are you listening to yourself?

Uncle BSFT: Don't you hear it? *makes tick-tock sounds*

Me: Of course I hear it, but I can't afford to have kids. I can't even afford a $70 phone bill.

Uncle BSFT: That's why you have a good baby daddy.

Me: Do you hear what you're saying? Excuse my french, but niggas don't take care of kids like they are supposed to. I know too many girls my age & younger who had kids to keep a nigga and are out here raising them by their selves. I don't want that struggle.

Uncle BSFT: I was just saying, you get on welfare and at least I would know where my taxes are going to. And if the dude wouldn't take care of the baby, that's when you have us handle that.

Me & my mother: That's not going to do anything. *Mom only* When that baby needs a crib, diapers, and bottles; who is going to be able to get that? Not me & definitely not her.

Uncle BSFT: That's when the child support is supposed to kick in.

Right then I just changed the subject. How can you tell your unemployed, still living at home with her mother, 25 yr old niece to get pregnant so that I can get welfare? Not dissing anyone who needs assistance from the government, but you would think he would want better for me. Then again, nope he doesn't. This is the same man who said to my younger cousin, "I can't believe my sister has 2 daughters, over the age of 21, and none of them have kids. That's shocking." Why is that shocking? You should be proud of that. Obviously, we were raised pretty good.

Outside of that little talk, I had a good time catching up with the fam. It's a shame I really don't see them and they live so close.. But that happens when your family is full of thieving, lying, conniving niggas.

9.2.11 Randoms

• Yesterday was the first day since I've left the house while sick. I felt great until I got a fever..
• I have officially been sick for 2 weeks and it's a off and on thing.
• Today will be the 2nd day I leave the house and I'm hoping that I don't get a fever while I'm out.
• My toe nail color has been the same for about 3 weeks. That's not normal for me.
• I haven't worn lipgloss or lipstick in 2 weeks.
• Being way too old for a Christmas list, I told my family if they get me anything this year, make sure it's a sewing machine.
• I got my bill for my ER visit yesterday: $450 for 3 liquid Tylenols, a strep test, and that's about it. Not having medical insurance is a bitch.
• I have a spot of eczema on the nape of my neck that is soooo not sexy and it hurts.

Today is????

• Idk what today is.
• Labor Day weekend & I'll be doing NOTHING.
• I actually like "Otis" now (after seeing the video a dozen times)
• Since the VMAs aired, I've been lowkey obsessing about Beyonce & Jay's baby. I don't even like them.
• I kinda hate when people ask "how far/close do you live from *insert Virginia city*"
• I'm still sick with Tonsillitis, but it's a off & on thing.
• I washed my hair 3 days ago, yet I've done nothing to my hair.
• When did you need a "membership" to go to a Free Clinic? VA sucks ass.
• Antibiotics are heavenly with devil worship mixed in.
• I have been bribed to leave the house for a milkshake. I really really really would love a milkshake though.
• Everything (bed linens, hoodies, sweaters) smells like my sweat.
• It's "cuffing season" and someone I know got caught up.. I'm glad for her though lol.
• Green toe nail polish may be making me feel sicker. Is that possible?
• My best friend is moving to NJ in October & I'm so jealous and excited for him.