Dilemma or not?

Back in high school, I use to be this blunt, super silly, forward girl who hung with the guys. I was so much of "one of the fellas", that whenever I would try to holla at a guy, they didn't take me seriously. Over time with much encouragement from my Mom & sister, I have slowly evolved into this girly, somewhat coy & shy woman.

The idea of being forward is not for me these days. I'm looking for a guy who will ask me out, because me asking him out is almost out of the question. But I'm noticing that most guys don't ask girls out like that anymore. Why is that? Especially when just approaching for general conversation, men don't do that anymore. Well at least not the men in my age range. They just stare in what I take as amazement & awe or disgust. I'm still not sure because I don't have the guts to ask. I know I hate the staring thing. If you see something you like, why not speak? And if they are staring because it's something they don't like, that's just rude. In recent days, I've been stared & waved at by several different guys in passing but no one has said anything. I HATE THAT! I guess I give off this look of disapproval or something, idk...

I recently realized that if the man won't change on his own, that's just who he is. Either you deal or you don't. And I have chosen to not deal with a certain guy. My mother thinks he'll change when he's ready, I highly doubt it. 6yrs came & gone, he has not once showed an ounce of difference. I feel stupid for waiting around (even though we were off & on the whole time) so long.

End of story, lesson learned.
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